Relationship Rituals

[tconnor]

Relationship Advice #66
Relationship Rituals

With the passage of time relationships can tend to fall into some negative and positive routines. Many of these contribute to the nurturing of the relationship while others can undermine its success. One of the things I have discovered over the years is that developing some rituals can ensure that the relationship stays on a positive track. Although no relationship is perfect (or ever will be) and experiences ups and downs these rituals can help keep the relationship focused on those attitudes, behaviors and feelings that you want to see continue.

Let me give you a few examples of some of the rituals I have come across over the years. Some of these have come from friends, some peers and others from members of my audiences who have shared them with me.

1. Have a date night on the same day of the week or days of the month. This date night isn’t subject to cancellation regardless of career or other issues. It takes priority no matter what.

2. Spend one day (or portion of a day) at least once a month discussing the positives in your relationship as well as some of the things you would like to change.

3. Play odd and even. Each partner is either odd or even (not in personality but the day of the week, week of the month or month of the year. If you are odd that means you call if you are out of town on odd days, even days your partner calls. Odd years you get to choose where and when you vacation, even years it is your partners choice. You can have some fun with this. It can include things like: who cooks, initiates sex etc.

4. Once a quarter one partner surprises the other with a special weekend retreat. Take turns.

5. Every morning one partner brings the other coffee and juice while the other sends flowers or some small token that says you are special. - I thought of you today and I want you to know I appreciate you.

6. Your turn. What are some rituals that you have in your relationship that keep it centered, focused and on target?