Are You Listening?

[tconnor]

Relationship Advice #172
Are You Listening?

One of the biggest weaknesses of most people is that they don’t listen. Listening is a different act from hearing. Hearing is a physical act that we do with our ears. Listening is a mental act that we do with our brains. Most people who fail to listen do it not because they are poor hearers.
Listening. Many factors contribute to a person’s poor listening behavior or habits. They include, but are not limited to:

• Distractions in the environment.
• The other person’s body language.
• The history of the relationship.
• Unresolved issues between the two people.
• A lack of interest in the subject.
• The pace of the other person’s dialogue.
• A limited vocabulary of either person.
• Personal unresolved issues with either person.
• Personal prejudices or judgments of either person.
• Personality style differences.

Any or all of these can get in the way of a person “getting” your message – understanding it. Observe the other person’s non-verbal messages while you are talking to him. He will tell you, without a doubt, whether he is listening to you or not. If there is any doubt that he is listening, ask him a question in the middle of one of your sentences. If he doesn’t answer, why bother with the rest of the message?

To improve your listening skills:

1. Stay focused on the other person.
2. Look for the theme of the message.
3. Key into the major points.
4. Control distractions.
5. Stay in the present.
6. Make lots of eye contact, and use responses such as, “I see,” “uh huh,” “Hmmm,” “Really.”
7. Pay attention to those things that draw your attention away from the other person and the message.

Improved listening will have a tremendous positive impact on all of your relationships. Listening to others is one of the greatest compliments you can pay that person.

[jeni_kristina]

YES sir I'am Listening

Thanks – this looks like a great Relationship Advice #172 for anyone who wants to become lovable.

Again thanks a lot!